“You need to find the right balance”
How do I know what the right balance is? Is it that I feel calmer, more rested? Or do I feel less rested, because I’m doing more and going out? What is it I need? Who bloody knows.
Equal parts of all, I suppose. But there’s no point asking because balance to me, isn’t balance to you. And balance to me this week absolutely isn’t what I needed last.
Last week was kinda shitty. What I needed was staying in most nights and only pushing myself to go for dinner at my friends one evening. I also went to IKEA which, on a Sunday, takes another kind of mindset altogether – but hey, meatballs are meatballs and that lingonberry jam can pull even the saltiest of people out a funk. Especially now it’s on a DIY pump at the end of the line. My plate was like a sea of red sweet lumpy happiness.
This week I feel like my balance bar is set a little higher.
No, I still haven’t done a food shop and yes, it is Thursday, but an impromptu trip to London to see the queen Ariana meant I could have Nando’s halloumi for dinner so who cares?
That’s the kind of balance I’m happy to work with. But to be fair, I had 4 Aldi fishcakes in the freezer and more mushrooms than I could shake a stick at. It’s kept me going until now, but I reckon if I have another garlic mushroom this week then that balance is going to be a mountain of salt and pepper chicken, chips and spring rolls all weekend.
I think finding balance is something I’m not too good at. How can anyone expect to juggle working full time, socialising with your friends and family, traveling, self-improvement, keeping your dog alive and finding that ever-elusive time to pamper yourself and unwind?
There’s only 24 hours in our day and for a third of them our eyes are shut. Hardly going to get the food shop done then, am I?
I haven’t got the capacity to organise a perfectly balanced day, let alone a balanced week. We can’t meticulously plan our time and have everything tick like clockwork. Things go wrong, things change.
It’s probably a fairer assumption that you can balance your expectations better than your life.
Knowing some weeks that you’ll be stressed and feel like everything is going too fast. Some weeks you’ll not want to do anything, and you’ll wear bobbly tracksuit bottoms on the sofa and eat pizza. And some weeks, you’ll feel like you’ve totally got all your shit together and think “ahh, so this is balance”. Then wave goodbye to it because it’s a lie and it doesn’t exist.
All you can do it your best.
I don’t think there is a perfect balance and all you can do is go with the flow, take yourself out of situations if in that moment you’re not feeling it, and if you want to go out 4 nights on the trot and feel like crap on a busy Sunday… absolutely bloody do it.
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